Sex is a quintessential human experience that is just as unique as the people involved in the act itself. Let’s face it, what turns on one person might be a turn off for someone else entirely. So what is it that makes a good lover? And more importantly, do you fit the bill? Ask yourself the following questions to see if indeed you are An Incredible Lover!
1) Do you take your time?
A connection, a real connection takes time. There is a rhythm to having great sex. One that includes a warm up (you’ve got to get one another excited), a work up to the main event (put your time and attention into your partner), the climax (who doesn’t love that part?) and the end (coming down from that climactic high).
That’s why taking your time and letting yourself and your partner really enjoy the experience marks you as a great lover.
2) Do you communicate in bed?
You’ve heard me mention it before, communication equals romance AND believe it or not it also equals great sex. Here’s how it works.
Listening, do you hear what your partner is reacting to when you are performing oral or touching certain erogenous zones? If your partner tells you they want to try something new are you receptive to their suggestions? If not, do you shut them down or find a compromise?
Talking works the same way. How does your partner know what you want and how you want it? If you don’t communicate it, they are in the dark. Moans are considered communication, so when your partner is down into those intimate parts, moan your way into sharing with them how much you’re enjoying it.
The VERY best part of communication is the dirty talk. If you’re not doing this yet, try and see how much in enhances the experience (trust me)
3) Do you know you’re own body and how to use it to make your lover feel good?
Yep, I went there. Knowing your own body and how to use it to make your partner feel good is an essential component to incredible sex. Your body has incredible powers over your partner. And if you’re not feeling good about it, if you’ve got some hang ups about the way you look, it can hinder the type of openness that enhances a great sexual atmosphere.
4) Do you give good oral? Really good oral?
There is something so sensual about your partner taking the time to pleasure you with their mouth. It’s a type of communication that tells your partner that you enjoy the way you taste and smell. It’s a level of commitment to the process of pleasure. If you’re new to a partner and don’t want to get in there just yet, I understand. But it’s worth testing out, trust me. You can never ever give too much oral!
5) Sex toys and Masturbation
The mark of an excellent lover is someone who is not jealous or resentful of masturbation, and not upset when sex toys come out to play. In fact if you truly are an incredible lover you’d suggest your partner masturbate. It increases sex drive, blood flow and encourages your partner to become more in tune with their body. And when the toys some out to play, they should be used to their fullest advantage. After all, your job as an incredible lover is to give your partner an orgasmic experience. And if toys make that easier or better, why not?
I hope all of you lovelies passed the incredible lover questionnaire. I know I did.
Hugs and kisses on all your naughty bits,
Brookelynn Berry, is a Canadian wordsmith and lover of all things chocolate-filled. She gets around. A lot. Check her out all over Twisted Sister And if you’re feeling hot and bothered (and a little bit naughty) check out Brookelynn over here. We won’t tell. Promise.