“What do you think you’re doing?”
“Who the hell are you?”
“I asked you first”
“What does it look like I’m doing? Same as you”
“No, no, no! This is my spot!”
“What do you mean? I’ve been coming to this place for some twelve years now”
“So? I’ve got five years on you”
“Seventeen eh? Impressive”
“So that gives me priority”
“The hell it does. Depends on your frequency doesn’t it? I could be operating double your rate for all you know”
“Suppose so. Surprised I haven’t bumped into you before then if you’ve been coming here all this time”
“Yeah well, it’s big enough to hide us all”
“That’s kind of the point”
“Exactly, so I say there’s plenty to go round. No need to get all territorial about it”
“How do I know you are what you say you are? That might just be your old lady you’re taking out there”
“Suspicious ain’t we? I could show you the bodies”
“A skeleton’s a skeleton”
“The more recent ones would still have some flesh on ‘em. You’d recognise your own right? I show you women’s bodies, you gotta know they’re not yours. So then we’re cool”
“Still don’t mean they’re yours. Could be anybody’s. I bump into you here for the first time, doesn’t mean there aren’t others working here”
“You seen any others?”
“No. But then I ain’t seen you before today either”
“You work on a cycle?”
“Yeah”
“Me too. Just I’m off schedule cos I just got released from the hospital. Small medical procedure needed attending to. But the Docs gave me the all-clear to return to work”
“Ha! Bet they didn’t imagine this was your line of work. That would kill them to find out”
“But they’re not going to find out are they?”
“Too true… What’s yours then?”
“Strangulation”
“Mine too. With a ligature”
“Oh no. I gotta have the feel of my hands on their flesh. Can’t beat that”
“I get that. Yeah absolutely. But forensics. Trace evidence and DNA”
“But they got to catch me first to compare. I’m not on any database. Besides, they gotta discover this place and dig ‘em up to get any trace and that ain’t happened yet”
“No one knows you huh?”
“Hey I know that glint. Come try it if you think you can take me before I take you”
“I gotta kill you cos you seen my face”
“I’m not going to snitch now am, I? We’re brothers in arms here”
“What is this the union? Serial Killers Local 516?”
“No but that would be pretty neat. Dues paid in blood and I’d like to see the Mob try and muscle in and control us!”
“Regular comedian ain’t we? I take my work seriously”
“Oh so do I I assure you. You take a trophy?”
“Of course…”
“Wha’d’ya take?”
“Finger”
“Aw come on man, give me more than that. Which is it? Ring finger? Index? Thumb? Pinkie?”
“Only one you left out. They can’t flip the bird when I’m done with ‘em”
“Heh that’s funny. Giving the finger to the cops without a finger! That’ll play merry hell with their psychological profiles”
“Cops ain’t going to find them so there ain’t going to be any profiling. Sounds to me like you wanna get caught and have all that fame stuff”
“No, not at all. But it might be nice to have our work discovered and appreciated”
“No. It’s only ever about the kill for me. That’s all that matters”
“Aren’t you going to ask me then?”
“Ask you what?”
“What I take for my trophies?”
“Yeah cos I’m really dying to know”
“I take noses”
“Noses?”
“Yeah. My corpse’s got no nose. How does she smell? Pretty bad for the first month or so out here”
“Okay that does it. You go on your way now. I’ve serious business to attend to here”
“Yeah me too. Nice meeting you.”
“Whatever. Don’t go doing anything I wouldn’t do”
*
Marc Nash has published four novels and five collections of flash fiction. He lives and works in London. You can find Marc just about anywhere, including on his YouTube channel, Twitter, his Amazon page, and over at http://sulcicollective.blogspot.ca/
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